Just after dinner tonight, one of our bunnies suddenly fell over, and within a few minutes, she was dead.
All four of the kids were there to see her fall over. I checked her airway, but there was nothing obstructing her breathing. Ana was on the phone trying to reach a vet clinic while I held Molly in my arms, petting her and praying. A couple of minutes later, her life slipped away. I tried CPR while the kids were praying and crying in the other room.
Nothing worked.
I told Ana she was gone.
She hung up the phone and set it down, then went to the kids to tell them that Molly was gone.
I had taken Molly into our bedroom when it was clear she wasn’t going to survive, so the kids wouldn’t have to watch her final convulsions. We wrapped her in the blanket that Cady had always used to swaddle her while she slept. Molly belonged to Cady, and she was Cady’s baby.
When I was sure she was dead, we brought the kids in to see her. I’ve seen death many times, one of the realities of working in law enforcement. Seeing Molly is a form of closure and an important part of the grieving process for our kids, and even our other pets. It’s a sad and painful experience, but if it’s possible, it is helpful and should be a part of the process. There were a lot of tears and shattered hearts, but they began to accept that she was gone.
Then we sat down as a family and talked about death.
Ana and I answered all of their questions. We held them as the waves of emotion ebbed and flowed. And we held it together for them so they could let it all out. We told stories about the cute things Molly did. We talked about the day I brought her home and how sweet she was. Her favorite thing was to be in the girls’ bedroom, and Cady would hold her in her arms on her back, and Molly would fall asleep there. She would hold Molly forever like that, just snuggling her, and Molly couldn’t get enough. They hung out together every day, sometimes for hours.
I just buried her little body.
Ana is upset, and so are the kids.
I turned to God and asked for peace and to heal my children’s hearts. The kids are sleeping in our room with us tonight because everyone wants to be close. We have so much to be thankful for, and tonight, we appreciate each other and all we have more than ever.
It will get better in time.
It will take a lot of prayer and understanding, plenty of hugs and tears, and some talking and a lot of listening. It will take patience and the love of Jesus over time, and we will get there. But we will never stop missing Molly.
